It ain’t Harvard, but…
Twin boys love to wrestle. I mean they love it. One of them is constantly on top of the other. I mean normal boys like to wrestle most of the time, but when you have your other half at your disposal it becomes ALL of the time – basically from the minute they wake up to the moment they go to sleep, we are telling them to get off each other. It’s nonstop – and I’m not talking like horsing around mind you, I am talking full on Greco-Roman or WWF smackdown. They never just sit. Whatever happened to just sitting. Why don’t people just ever sit anymore? Oh right, they are 4. I might also have something to do with it. I’ll come home from work and throw them both on the floor and roll around rolling them under, over and through me. You’d think I’d have learned my lesson. They had just eaten dinner and I’m holding K up in the air and my wife is screaming – “he just ate, he just ate”. I’m in mid-sentence, “don’t be such a fuddy d…” – when K throws up all over my face. But Nope, I keep doing it so I admit to some degree of fault here.
One thing about Brooklyn is that the Pre-K admission process is very competitive. During “application season” it’s the talk of the town.
“Do you know where you are sending them yet?” or “my (insert name here) has been accepted to this school and that school and we are having a hard time deciding” – I’m like, whoop-de-do, here’s your friggin’ medal.
We had applied to a few schools but had 2 top choices. One that was partially subsidized by the city and one that was completely private. Well listen, I’m all for private school, but if it can be helped I draw the line at paying $25,000 per kid for them to play with blocks and draw with crayons – let’s be real, they aren’t learning Newtonian physics or how to calculate the hypotenuse of a triangle. Anyway, back to wrestling – it almost cost us $50,000. The boys had to give an “interview” with our cheaper (I mean first) choice. Interview my ass – they say they want to have a chance to interact with potential students, but really it’s a chance to size them up and make sure they won’t drive the teachers insane. So, a week or two before their scheduled date, we were going through dialogue with the boys. Things like “don’t forget to say hello” and concepts like when the Principal asks you your name, answer, don’t stick your face into mommy’s butt.
The big day arrived and they make it through the tour and the meeting with the teachers and all goes well. Then they meet with the Principal and it looks like my wife is going to make it through unscathed. What do they do? – K decides he’s bored and gets out of his chair and grabs J by the back of his shirt, throws him to the floor and jumps on top of him. So, there it is, my poor wife, sitting there with the principal pretending to carry on a conversation about how the boys are ready to start going to school and meanwhile the Principal is looking at her like she’s raising two little chimpanzees. By some miracle the boys started school in the fall, so it’s probable the school needed money – hooray to government cut-backs.
mydarlingdevils 